The happy couple on their 50th wedding anniversary.

The happy couple on their 50th anniversary. One of my favorite evenings ever was the night of my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary party. Both Mom and Dad knew we (the kids) were up to something, and had begged us not to “go overboard,” but come on…what did they expect? We’re the damned Wilsons, afterall. “Going overboard” is our middle name.

When people emailed me after the big event, they all wanted to know how it went. Here is the email I sent out to anyone that asked:

In a word, it was perfect. The place was packed, the food was excellent, the laughs came easily, and the tears even easier. We had my folks sitting up at one end of the room in plain view of everyone, and a lot of us took turns going up telling comical stories about them (my Dad would counter with a comical rebuttal as he thought that this whole event was going to be a roast!) or getting very emotional and telling Mom and Dad what they’ve meant to them over all the years. People that none of us had ever seen cry would end their speech in tears — my 16 year old nephew Jason, who has always been Mr. Athlete/Mr. Cool couldn’t even speak past a certain point because his emotions had just overwhelmed him. He just turned and had to kiss my Mom and hug my Dad. Friends of Mom and Dad spanning more than 60 years were at this event. All eight of their grandchildren were present as were their two great-grandchildren. We had just about fifty people there — fitting for a 50th wedding anniversary, eh?

My oldest brother Matt, who is the very stoic one, got up and spoke for over ten minutes. What was amazing was that two miracles occurred here — my other brother, sister and I had no idea that he could speak in public (and very well at that!) but that he was able to do something that we had never seen done…he brought ***MOM*** to tears with mere words. Dad’s easy…as you’ve heard through the stories of how I’ve made the old man tear up with a well-written card or letter. Mom, however, usually just gets teary eyed during soap operas or “The Waltons”. My sister got up after my oldest brother and was unable to say what she wanted to (Teresa, my sis, is the quickest to tears in our family) but had also brought up a book of letters that people had written to her in regards to my folks — people from all over that couldn’t make it for one reason or another but wanted to share a story or anecdote about Mom and Dad. Teresa would read excerpts from these letters and Mom & Dad would have to guess who had written them. It was cute — someone would write about how they’d never forget the time Dad had done something to help them out or when one of the kids had done something cute at their house during a visit, etc. Mom and Dad pretty much nailed each one. The adorable part for me during all of this was standing off to the side and watching Mom and Dad — Dad, in his eternal elder statesmen persona, with the powerful voice and quick wit sat by Mom’s side, the emotions bubbling up just beneath his tender demeanor… Mom, eyes twinkling, flashed the same smile that has never changed whatsoever in all her years as I can attest to having poured through the hundreds of pictures that I used to make my movie about them. It was classic. My other brother, who had been sick with flu-like symptoms (which I now have, grrr), is usually the biggest talker in the family but was unable to say much due to his still being near death. So, the turn to speak was handed over to…me.

I got up, walked in front of Mom and Dad’s table, and turned and smiled at them. I could already feel the tears welling up in my eyes. Mom and Dad, seeing my eyes wetting, both said “uh-oh” in a comical way at the same time, which got a laugh from the crowd. Most everyone in that room knew that I’d have something huge planned — the movie — but wasn’t sure what it would be. I stood up and spoke for about five minutes. “I met these two wonderful people thirty-two years ago…yesterday, to be exact. I don’t remember much. I know I was there. I know that I hit it off with them instantly. And I’ve been told that I set the tone for the relationship with them right off the bat — I curled into Mom and peed on Dad.” That’s true — the first time my father held me I peed on him. I told stories on Mom and Dad, both of which elicited laughter from the masses. I then broke into telling the story about how I had set out to write down the ten most influential people in my life…and how Mom made me make her number one or else I’d get into trouble. I then explained what each one had done that I considered to be the greatest influences in my life — Mom had taught me compassion, to listen to people and to hear both sides of any argument, to not worry so much about life’s troubles when they come my way, and to beat down anyone and everyone at Scrabble. Dad had taught me the value of laughter, the power of sentimentality, how to be a true romantic, and then went on for a bit on how he introduced me to the wonderful world of movies. I then explained how I had treated myself to a digital camcorder for my 31st birthday and felt that it was high time that I truly put it to use. At this point I made mention on how I had been banned from giving Dad any kind of gifts that would make him cry but that I felt the ban could be lifted this one time due to the circumstances. I then reached into my suit coat and pulled out a packet of three cloth handkerchiefs that had a bow on top. “Here ya go, Pop…I have a feeling you’re gonna need these.” The lights were dimmed and I turned on my movie, which was shown on a TV held up on a pedestal close to Mom and Dad.

Wow.

The whole place was riveted and glued to the screen. People laughed, smiled, and cried. I stood in the back of the room, beaming, watching my parents’ finally watching this labor of love that I had worked on for countless hours over the span of a month and a half which I had entitled “The Fairy Tale”. My Mom recognized that I had put her favorite song of all time into the opening credits. Dad was on the verge of tears but making jokes throughout it, adding commentary as various pictures came on. My miracle occurred during the segment in which I presented their wedding day as I watched my Mom’s smile slowly give way to quivering lips…and she slowly raised her hands, lifted her glasses away, and wiped away tears from both eyes. I had done it. I had brought my Mother to tears in the gentle way that I wanted to…I knew that at that moment Mom knew how much I really and truly adore her and how much she means to me. The movie went on — it ended up just being under fifteen minutes in length although it seems like five — and people loved it. At the very end, after we’ve dealt with a segment showing 60+ years of family and friends, I have a series of shots of words that slowly tell Mom and Dad thanks for everything while Joe Cockers “You Are So Beautiful” plays in the background. The cards went:

So, had you two never met…

the people gathered in this room today…

and countless others scattered about…

would never have come together…

or even existed…

and had the lives we’ve all shared.

Thank you, Mom. Thank you, Dad.

You’ve given us the greatest gift of all…

…each other.

So, for everything that you’ve done for all of us…

we’d like to give something back.

It’s an original painting, entitled…

“The Fairy Tale”

Fifty years of love, life, family and friends…

for the couple that truly defined the words…

…true love.

Ladies and gents, “The Fairy Tale”.

The movie then slowly pans up the length of the painting we had made for them…and Dad, who is about to start weeping, manages to squeak out a high-pitched “that’s a painting!”. The last time I heard his voice this high and about to crack was when I presented him with the shadow box for Christmas, 2000, that contained all the memorabilia from he and his father and their patriotism. The four kids — me, Matt, Doug, and Teresa — then came into the room and gave them the actual painting while my movie ran out…”and they lived happily ever after. The end.”

This was my favorite moment of the whole event…and easily the most over-powering. I had to stop behind Matt, Doug, and Teresa — who carried the painting on up to them — because I was just completely overwhelmed with emotion. I couldn’t even stand on my own two feet I was so weakened from the moment. I went down on one knee and wept. I managed to wipe away the thick tears to peer up to see Dad hugging Doug, who was in line in front of me, and he caught my eye. I rose up, took the final few steps to get up there, and Dad shook my hand and then pulled me into a huge hug… and kissed my cheek. Dad had *never* kissed me before until that moment in my life. I could have extinguished a four-alarm fire with the amount of water that poured from my eyes then. Mom, tears in her eyes as well, hugged me and kissed me, telling me how wonderful of a job I did on the movie. I became conscious of the applause that was thundering behind us and, drying my eyes, went over to turn off the movie and bring the lights back up.

Wow.

I’ve been through many wonderful, tear-inducing moments in my life…but that one takes the cake. I know that now as a fact because I have the biggest damn cold sore of my life currently — I always get a cold sore when I cry really hard. I think this thing should have its own damn zip code. Grrr.

I cracked open an eleven year old bottle of Dom Perignon that I had bought years ago for a special occasion and you pretty much can’t top that. Mom and Dad tapped glasses and took a drink…as did I. I then walked around and offered some of the champagne to anyone that wanted any and heard the most incredible responses to the movie I had made for Mom and Dad. So, I’m walking around with a bottle of very nice champagne in one hand and one of Dad’s handkerchiefs in another.

The event was a huge success. EVERYONE came up to me, Matt, Doug, and Teresa individually and thanked us for doing all of it and for inviting them. Even the guy who owned the bed and breakfast where we had it came up to tell us that it was the most well-organized, emotionally charged, and incredible event that had ever taken place in the history of that bed and breakfast. His wife, who had crept in to watch the movie, even teared up during a few segments of it. We all just beamed. We had secretly arranged to have Mom and Dad stay at the bed and breakfast that night and handed them over a bag we had packed for them. As people filed out over time, eventually it just came down to being Mom, Dad, and the four kids. Dad poured all kinds of praise upon us and Mom took credit for having made all of us creative and smart. We all hugged and that was it.

Alex and I spent the night at my folks’ place that night as I wanted to hear their take on the whole event on a private level. Matt, Doug, and Teresa all came over and we stayed up until the wee hours of the morning talking about how well it had come off and also told Mom and Dad stories. It was a blast as we’ve rarely hung out with all of us together. We hit the hay and talked to Mom and Dad the following day. The painting had already been hung in the living room by the time they came home and Dad immediately walked in and looked for it. Standing silently in front of it, he raised his camera and snapped a photo of it…revealing a tear when the camera came down. He then questioned me as if I was on a grand jury — how long did it take for me to make the movie, who painted the portrait, how long had we all been planning this, etc. etc. etc. It was cool.

The day went on and I helped Dad put up a new entertainment center to go with the new gigantic TV he bought. When I had wired and rewire everything he asked me to test out the new TV with the movie I had made…with only the two of us watching it. Oh boy. I’m in for it. So, I hooked my camera into the TV and played it. We both sat in silence — two weep-prone men — and watched the movie. When it came down to the part where the painting is revealed, Dad reached over and patted me on the leg…we were both crying. He looked over at me — I didn’t want to look over at him because I knew what I’d see, and it was going to make me bawl even more, but I turned anyway — and there he was, tears all down his face, motioning over to the painting hanging on the wall. His voice squeaked out “that’s so great” and then began clapping his hands quietly for me…and I lost it again.

Mission accomplished.

Just when I thought it couldn’t get ANY worse…he went and got Mom and we three watched it from the beginning. Mom even teared up again.

I think this was Dad’s way of getting me back for making him cry.

So, all in all, this was one of the greatest days of my entire life. Mom and Dad know beyond the shadow of a doubt how highly revered, respected, and above all, loved they are as individuals and as a couple.

I wish you could have seen it.