It's all about the legs.

I love dating. Sure, I’m a nervous wreck for each and every first date with someone, but overall I’ve always enjoyed it. Getting the chance to get to know someone better while spending time doing fun things? Come on, that’s good stuff.

Growing up I was a nerd — big shock, eh? — and didn’t get into the swing of dating until high school. Being brought up by older parents, my “style” was much more old fashioned. One of my favorite memories with my Dad while growing up happened during some random evening while I was in my room listening to the radio and playing video games on my Atari home computer. Bursting into my room, The Old Man bequeathed some very powerful knowledge onto his youngest son in regards to the world of dating.

During this chat he passed along to me what I’ve come to call “The Rules” which have served me well over the years. Those four rules of dating?

1. Always hold the door.
2. Always pay for everything.
3. Always listen.
4. Always take off your coat and put it around the girl in bad weather, no matter the cost to yourself.

On that last point Dad went on to tell me “I don’t care if it’s in the middle of a blizzard, you take your coat off and wrap it around them or put it over their legs if they are sitting down to provide extra warmth. Why? Because women are more important than men. Women can bring new life into this world while we can’t. Got it?”

With that, I nodded and he left my room just as quickly as he had entered it. At the time I didn’t think much of that life lesson but over the years I’ve come to realize that this was some of the best advice I’ve ever been given, period. Dad was giving me the basis of his chivalrous code and a cornerstone of why my Mom remained by his side for over fifty years.

Dating as much as I have in the past, I discovered and fine-tuned an almost perfectly fool-proof system that allows any date to be fun. The idea is based up on the “legs” system. No, not legs as in legs, which I love so much…but legs as in “a porton of a trip.”

While a lot of guys fall into the dinner-and-a-movie bland first date concept, the general idea behindthe “legs” system entails having a series of mini-dates ready to go at a moment’s notice while out and about. If, while out with the woman, I discover that it’s just not gonna work out for whatever reason the date can be wrapped up conveniently at the end of a leg. For example, let’s say that the first leg of the date is meeting for drinks. If the date is going to be a bust, why prolong it? You can call it off amicably at the end of drinks. No harm, no foul. On the flip side, let’s say that you’re interested in your date and want to prolong it…bingo, you already have the next leg of your date pre-planned in your head so you just progress from there. So, before any date, do your research. If you don’t, you’re missing out.

One of my favorite dates of all time came about with a woman I met up with in St. Joe. I had five legs planned for that date in the event that I was completely taken by her. When I greeted her at the door with a three roses — one white, one yellow, and one orange. Hey, some old habits die hard…besides, betcha didn’t know that rose colors have meanings, did ya? When she opened the door and I saw how stunningly beautiful she looked in her lil’ black dress, I knew that I was in trouble.

The first leg involved dinner at a restaurant that overlooked the river. We laughed, exchanged silly stories, enjoyed a good bottle of wine, and flirted. Once we were finished with dinner, she mentioned that she was stuffed so that put the kibosh on Leg #2 (which was going to a nearby ice cream shop for dessert). Naturally, this called for me to put Leg #3 into action.

Having listened (rule #2) to her during phone conversations leading up to the date, I remembered that she loved live music. Knowing that, I did a little research beforehand and had found a bar featuring a band playing that night a short walk from the ice cream place but now just a short drive from where we were eating. We headed over there, knocked back a few drinks, and listened to the band play. After their set wrapped up I was ready to spring Leg #4 on her but informed her that it was a surprise if she was up to it. She was. Onto Leg #4, then.

This was the leg I was hoping we’d get to as it was a complete and total surprise. At one point in our early conversations she had asked me if I smoke. When I told her that I didn’t smoke cigarettes but loved a good cigar I was happy to hear that she, too, liked a good stogie. So before I headed out on our date, I swung by my favorite cigar shop and picked up a couple of flavored cigars for her and then one of my favorites. I had packed a late night picnic, complete with chocolates and another rose (a red one this time) and surprised the hell out of her with all of it as we set up camp beneath a tree by a lake.

The weather outside was perfect and we sat and chatted until it was pretty late. My last leg involved taking a stroll around the lake we were sitting beside but I never got a chance to spring that on her as she invited me back to her place for drinks.

Overall, the date was damn near perfect. At any point during the date, had she not been as cool as she was, I could have easily walked away from the date and it wouldn’t have ended on a bad note. Yet, it went the distance and we both had a great time.

That, in a nutshell, is my view on dating. I love it. It’s fun. It’s a perfect chance to get to know someone and find out if we’re interested in one another and, if so, I usually have a trick up my sleeve to extend the date thanks to the “legs” system. Guys? Try it the next time you’re going to be going out with someone new in your life…it’s a great way to add some flair to your dates and shows them that you’re truly interested. On the flip-side, it’s the perfect way to end a date early on if need be so that everyone wins.

Ahh, legs. Happy dating!